CODENAME INTERIVEW: HOWLIN' MAD MURDOCK
by The-Lady-Undertaker
Summary: Episode 1 of my interview series, this epidsode starring Capt. Murdock from the A-Team!
1. Chapter 1

Hey people! I'm back! And this time it's a co-write with my good A-Team Buddy The-Time-Travling-Hippie! Enjoy and comment!

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CODENAME INTERVIEW FICTION EPISODE I

WHERE I INTERVIEW PEOPLE WHO MAY OR MAY NOT EXIST!

TONIGHT'S SPECIAL GUEST... CAPT. H.M. MURDOCK

LADY U. : HEY EVERYONE! TONIGHT I'M AM PLEASED TO ANNOUNCE THE FIRST IN, WHAT I HOPE TO BE, A SEIRES OF ONESHOT INTERVIEWS WITH PEOPLE WHO MAY OR MAY NOT EXTIST, OUR FIRST GUEST IS! CAPT. H. M. MURDOCK!

Murdock: Howdy, Muchacho. Glad to be here.

Lady U: Thanks for coming! (shakes your hand) So... To get things started off... I have a small list of questions for you to answer, and all the questions together will describe you and introduce you to our audience!... Are you ready Capt.?

Murdock: As ready as I'll ever be.

Lady U: Alrighty then! Here we go! If you were a flower... what kind of flower would you be and what color would you be?

Murdock: Well, I'd be a Dandelion of course! When you pick 'em and blow 'em and the seeds go flyin'- yep that'd be me. I'd be a blue one, 'cus then I'd blend in with the sky.

Lady U: Awwwwwwwww! How cute!... Ehem... I mean... that's lovely... *cough* Next question! If you were an animal, what animal would you be?

Murdock: Hmm, I think I'd be a dog. Billy and I could go chasin' cars an' tennis balls together. Then we'd go for a drive in B.A's van and stick our heads out the window. Don't know if the big guy'd like that, though...

Lady U: Alright, now... Next question. name three of your favorite people!

Murdock: That's easy! Hannibal, B.A and the Faceman.

Lady U: You know... I had a feelin' you might say that! Alright! Last question! If you had a choice, and if you could time travel... would you go back to the past, or take a peak into the future?

Murdock: Well, I ain't exactly had the best past, y'know? So, I think I'd take a lil look into the future. But, I'm happy just where I am right now. The future can be a scary thing, almost as scary as fruit bats. There aren't any fruit bats here are there!?

Lady U: No, we don't have any fruit bats, nor are we known to have fruit nats all in all, for our views to know... You, my dear Capt. are a easy goin' guy who loves ta' fly, a people person, and is a man who loves his friends. Am I accurate Capt?

Murdock: On the nosey, Amigo.

Lady U: Anything else about your backround you wanna tell your fans about?

Murdock: Well, there's nothin' else to tell, only t' steer clear of ammonia *shudders*.

Lady U: Well my friend, I agree with you 100%. Alright, next question, what do you think about your very many lady fans out there in the audiance? *cue various women in the audiance shouting and screaming* As you can very well see, and hear.

Murdock: *Eyebrows raise* I didn't know I was so popular! This is more of Face's game, but... hello there ladies. *Tips hat* Glad to know some people take a shinin' to lil ol' me.

Lady U: Well as you can see you are very much popular. But you mentioned Face earlier, for those who aren't familiar with you and your friends, how 'bout a little background information?

Murdock: Ooh, I love doin' the intros! Well, first of all there's Hannibal; he's the brains, the leader, the guy with all the answers. He's also been our father ever since we formed our unit in 'Nam, always looked after us.

Then there's the big guy, B.A, my blood brother. He's the muscle, the mechanical genius and the lovable gold-wearing Mudsucker. He's all bark an' no bite, though I wouldn't pet him too much.

An' finally, the icin' on the cake; Templeton Peck, or the Faceman to you and me. The womanising conman, who can get anythin' he wants just by the bat of his eyelashes. He's my best buddy.

Lady U: It sounds like you're very fond of each and every one of them. So, now it's time to recall some fav. Moments. Starting with Hannibal. What is your favorite. Moment with him?

Murdock: I think when Hannibal was helpin' me come up with ideas for the golf ball liberation movement. He suggested a telethon- he's such a wise man.

Lady U: sounds like he cares a lot about you.

Murdock: Oh he does! He cares 'bout all of us. *Nods*

Lady U: speaking of "all of us".What About a fella named B.A?

Murdock: B.A's a big ol' teddy bear. When I took that bullet, he took care of me. Even when I push his buttons and get him all riled up, I know the big guy still cares.

Lady U: sounds like you two have a brotherly type of bond.

Murdock: Well, we are blood brothers, even if B.A doesn't like to admit it.

Lady U: And what about Face?

Murdock: That's a hard one; Face and I've had some great moments, but I think my favourite has got to be when we harmonised together, singing "surf city". I've tried to persuade him into forming a barbershop quartet with the rest of the Team, but he's a bit shy when in comes to performin'.

Lady U: *LAUGHS* Sounds like you all have had some great moments together. Have you ever had those moments you wish didn't happen? If you don't mind me asking.

Murdock: It's fine, you gotta have a little bad with the good, sometimes. The whole ordeal with the Team endin' up in jail really got me down. Actually, everythin' to do with Morrison. The fact that we were framed just boiled my biscuits, if you know what I mean.

Lady U: I understand completely. I would hate to think of anyone messing with my family. So... How many years have you been running with the team?

Murdock: Hmm... Well, I've been at the funny farm for over ten years, so I must have been running with the Team for that amount of time, too. I might be completely wrong; this intermittent memory loss can be a curse sometimes.

Lady U: Well I'm sorry to hear about your memory problem. But it could be worse. Have you met anyone while at the "funny farm"?

Murdock: My memory problem? I have a memory problem? There's this guy, Leo Bell, he's in the room next t' mine. He can fit a whole jar of peanut butter in his mouth, lid an' all. Then there's... Mulligan. He rips out sinks...

Lady U: So you've made some good friends during your stay. Do they wonder where you go when you go on missions with the team?

Murdock: I think everyone does. 'Cept Mulligan, o' course, he's too busy destroyin' the place.

Lady U: I've heard around that you've also gotten a few Military visits too. Got any favorite ones?

Murdock: Definitely when Lynch payed a visit the first time 'round. You should'a seen the look on his face! Priceless!

Lady U:Speaking of Lynch, what do you think about him, and the military in general. You yourself are a Capt. after all.

Murdock: Lynch ain't a bad guy, he's just a little dim, if you know what I mean. The military, hmmm. Well, I can't bash it, but it should definitely treat its returnin' soldiers better.

Lady U: I agree with you. You said Lynch isn't a bad guy, what about Decker?

Murdock: Decker, he's just mean. I think he's obsessed with tryin' t' catch us, but he knows he never will.

Lady U: And all of your fans know he never will. Am I right people?! *cue audience shouts and screams* So, onto the next subject... I am a 100% fan girl! Is there anything, a comic or T.V. show you can never get enough of?

Murdock: A comic, the Fantastic Four. It's one of my favourites. And for a T.V. show, the Range Rider.

Lady U: how about as a child?

Murdock: I was a big fan of planes, as you may have all ready guessed. I used t' sneak out t' the airfield and watch 'em go up. I also used t' read mystery books quite a lot.

Lady U: Any specific books you ready,, mystery or otherwise?

Murdock: Oh, you know, just the classics; The Murderer Is A Fox, And Then There Were None. I'm a mystery-nut, you see.

Lady U: I just so happen to be in love with the book And then there were none! it's a favorite of mine I've read about 6 times. So from 1 mystery nut to another, do you ever try to figure out who dunit?

Murdock: Well it wouldn't be much fun if you didn't!

Lady U: So we've heard about your friends and your family... Is there any one else in your life? Who may or may not be a lady friend? Or is there a place in your heart still waiting for a Mrs. Murdock to be? *cue crazed fangirl screams*

Random Audiance Member: I LOVE YOU MURDOCK! *tries to climb onto the stage*

Murdock: *Taken aback* I, uh, love you too, random audience member... I do have a special someone in my heart, actually. Her name is Kelly, and she's the most beautiful girl in the world. Unfortunately, I can't see her often, because, as y'all know, my residence at the Wacky Shack makes that a tad inconvenient, and runnin' with the Team an' all, too. But sometimes, she pays a visit at the VA and brings pizza.

Lady U: Could we have a description of "the most beautiful girl in the world"?

Murdock: Short, chocolate hair, light eyes, a smile brighter than the sun. Just everythin' 'bout her's perfect.

Lady U & All of the Female Audience:AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

Murdock: *Smiles*.

Lady U: So, how did you two meet? Was it love at first sight?

Murdock: I was Murdock-napped from the fruitcake factory and held prisoner patiently by some slime-balls, but I escaped! I hid in Kelly's van, and, fortunately for me, dogs get on well with Pilot's: she had a nice big'un right in the back. As soon as she opened those back doors and looked down at me with that terrified expression, I instantly fell head over heels for her.

Lady U: Sounds like a once in a life time meeting for a woman that's one in a million, wouldn't you say so Capt.?

Murdock: Exactly! I wouldn't have wanted to meet her any other way.

Lady U: Awww... Ehem... so now I'd like to ask-

Crazed Fan: MURDOCK!*climbs onto the stage* I LOVE YOU!

Lady U: Security! Maybe now is a good time to cut to commercial?

Murdock: Uh, yeah. I think you're right 'bout that. Can I please say the line!?

Lady U: Sure! You do that and...

Crazed Fan: No let me Go! Murdock!*Security begins to drag her off stage*

Lady U: Hit it Capt.!

Murdock: *Turns to face camera and grins* We'll be right back after these messages.

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So I hope you guys liked it! Ch. 2 up next!


	2. Chapter 2

Lady U: And we're back! Sorry about the little...um... yeah... What can we say? We love you... Heh heh...

Murdock: Well, I love y'all, too, Muchacho's.

Lady U: So Capt? How bout a little background info? Where did ya grow up?

Murdock: I grew up in Texas. Mighty proud of it, too.

Lady U; Oooh! A country boy! Did you grow up livin in a house in the capital or...?

Murdock: Just in a lil' town outside the Capital. Lovely lil' place; nice an' quiet.

Lady U: Did you have any family around?

Murdock: My mama passed away when I was five, dad disappeared soon after I was born. I went to live with my grandparents, then. They passed when I was in 'Nam.

Lady U: Well i'm sorry ta' hear that. But I know, that they would be very proud of you. Look at how you turned out!

Murdock: A crazy guy, who lives part-time in a mental institution and runs from the military with three fugitives? I'm sure they would be! *Grins*

Lady U: And I bet you have a fun time doin' it too!

Murdock: Sure do! Wouldn't change my career for the world.

Lady U : So, just how smart are you Capt.? I've heard that you've learned a number of language. So, just how many do you know?

Murdock: I know Spanish, German, Vietnamese, Japanese, a little bit o' Russian and Mandarin Chinese. It all helps when ya gotta travel to diff'rent places, y'know?

Lady U: I bet! How did you learn all of them?

Murdock: Well, I picked up most of my Vietnamese in 'Nam. I learnt the rest easily from readin' and learnin' a bit o' Spanish at school. But the Chinese was an interestin' one. Woke up one day with a gonzo headache an' I could read an' speak the language!

Lady U: What's a "Gonzo headache"?

Murdock: Kinda like a Migraine.

Lady U: OH! Alright, next question. Just how many jobs has the A-

team been on?

Murdock: Now, that one, I don't 'xactly know. There's been a couple I ain't been on, but there's a lot I have been on. I'd say over 100, at least.

Lady U: Oh wow... So I guess you guys have that down to a science.

Murdock: Sure do! It's all thanks to Hannibal's "Jazz".

Lady U: For those of us who aren't familiar with the term jazz, how bout a little explanation. What is... the jazz?

Murdock: The "Jazz" is the fuel for Hannibal's crazy plans. It's highly contagious.

Lady U: Sounds like fun. Have you any friends now that you've met while on the job?

Murdock: Because we try to stay on the down low, we can't really keep in touch with clients, but we have stayed in contact with a few army buddies we helped out one time.

Lady U: Do you ever take your cliants to lunch? Or is that no-no?

Murdock: If we're workin' with them, then I guess we can. What confuses me is that no clients wanna get a Captain BellyBuster- they're delicious AN' nutritious.

Lady U :I'd go with you Murdock!

Murdock: Then it's settled! Bellybusting surprise packs for everyone!

Lady U: Yahoo! We can leave after the interview is over. But I do have just a few more questions for you.

Murdock: Fire away, Muchacho.

Lady U: Are you or would you ever concider yourself an actor?

Murdock: Well Face is the actor of the Team, but I do help him on his scams sometimes. I've been in a few productions, too. I guess you could call me an actor, to a certain degree.

Lady U: Would that be something you would like to do professionally?

Murdock: No. I have schizophrenic tendencies; I don't need multiple personalities under my belt, too. Now, eating Twinkies, that'd be a job I'd love to do!

Lady U: I second that emotion! Now for my last question... Are you really as crazy as you make everyone think you are? Or are you just that crazy?...

Murdock: *Pauses* I'll let you figure that out, Chica; everyone has their own definitions o' crazy. To most people, I am, but t' the Team (excludin' B.A) I'm as solid as a rock, just a little diff'rent. *Smiles*

Lady U: I think that's that is a perfect answer! What do you guys think?! *talks to audience*

Audience: Yeah!

Lady: And it's also a fantastic way to end this program! Mrudock would you do the honors?! *smiles*

Murdock: Sure! Thank y'all for watchin', this has been Codename Interview Fiction, g'night!


End file.
